che

2009-01-28T05:05:00.000-08:00

{RACHEllE} is uncrushable/ says:
hey!
che says:
hi
che says:
RACHEL
che says:
help me
che says:
i feel horrible
{RACHEllE} is uncrushable/ says:
wad happened??
{RACHEllE} is uncrushable/ says:
omg
{RACHEllE} is uncrushable/ says:
want me to call u??
che says:
MY DAD LOST 1500 BUCKS IN BLACKJACK YTD
che says:
no lah
che says:
don't need
che says:
wth
{RACHEllE} is uncrushable/ says:
family??
che says:
is this how they treat money
che says:
NO
che says:
my mum's "friends"
che says:
wah lao
che says:
they won't feel the pinch for my dad ah?
che says:
keep betting and betting
{RACHEllE} is uncrushable/ says:
so ur mum knew abt it??
che says:
and he only became the banker because nobody else wanted
che says:
YES
che says:
damn pissed at them
che says:
and i want to comfort my dad but i want to let him knw that it is wrong also
che says:
that's why im feeling horrible
{RACHEllE} is uncrushable/ says:
ok dont be so upset kays?? i guess its only gn be this one time of the year and they wld learn from this experience and be extra careful nx time
che says:
please
che says:
i hope they do
{RACHEllE} is uncrushable/ says:
i think just let the matter pass
che says:
but i tld him something quite mean
che says:
i tld him.. nvm,nxt time when i grow up i won't gamble
{RACHEllE} is uncrushable/ says:
cus i think it wld create a bigger situation if u bring it up
che says:
i knw lah
{RACHEllE} is uncrushable/ says:
its too sensitive right now
che says:
he told me
che says:
haiyoh
che says:
now i can't act cheery in front of him to cheer him up
che says:
im damn pissed off at my mum's "friends"
che says:
she is a damn bad host alr nvm
che says:
when the food they catered came, my mum gave my dad the money to help her pay
che says:
and he helped them carried the food in
che says:
while my mum watch her friends play mahjong
che says:
and while the host played mahjong
{RACHEllE} is uncrushable/ says:
i unds i unds
che says:
my dad got ego also leh
{RACHEllE} is uncrushable/ says:
maybe its really an adult's issue that we dont unds
che says:
and they actually don't take over quickly when they saw him losing
che says:
and they smoke
{RACHEllE} is uncrushable/ says:
i mean to me this is like a really touchy subject
che says:
and i can't tell my mum how lousy i feel her friends are
che says:
the thing is the host actually helped one of my mum's friend who lost abt the same amt to recoup his losses
che says:
and she didn't even offer my dad help
che says:
like seriously
che says:
he is not even a friend
che says:
or not even a friend's husband
{RACHEllE} is uncrushable/ says:
ok ok

{RACHEllE} is uncrushable/ says:
yah i think sometimes the people we love just get used like that and we lose out more than we ever shld, and it sucks to be able to do nth abt it
{RACHEllE} is uncrushable/ says:
i think just let the matter rest, and when the time is ok just give a small reminder to ur parents not to gamble n perhaps sbe careful of those fwens
{RACHEllE} is uncrushable/ says:
do it subtlely cus u dont wanna hurt ur parents too or make em think ure being too bossy n rude bah
che says:
ya i know
che says:
that's why i feel bad now
che says:
but i don't know how to make my dad feel better

ok.great. i ranted to rach and i feel much better now.
God, please give me wisdom and teach me how to comfort my dad too.

but really. i will quit gambling. even with 10 cents.
1500 is someone's salary, maybe two people's.
it's about 8 months of my pocket money.
REMEMBER TO REMIND ME TO KEEP THIS PROMISE.

EVERYBODY, DON'T BE GREEDY.

love,
che.

2009-01-25T06:59:00.000-08:00

beauty about to be slaughtered. nah. this is the picture taken before she became a botak. poor her. daddy cut a bit of her ear. ( NOTE THE PUN!!!)

say hi to jie. ( or maybe jie's fringe)

the four of us, on the way to gong gong's house.

mum and dad. because dad said he wasn't prepared, they took another one..( look below)

with the smiles now.

my wish this year is that i'll be ablt to improve my teochew and take the initiative to talk to ah gong. : )

love,

che.

2009-01-25T06:48:00.000-08:00

hi blog. guess you gurls have gotten enough pictures from facebook. some additional ones. : )

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GURLS! ( once again)

shir bought her first 4D.

love,

che.

2009-01-06T05:30:00.000-08:00

hi blog.
haven't been blogging because i simply have nothing to blog about.
met up with friends and all but i can't access and upload the pics i took with them because i don't have a facebook account!

i don't wanna set up one.

ok. let's see.

the new year is here. and because it's still the holidays( fortunately) , it feels like 2008.
but im starting to feel empty already. THAT day is arriving.

the day whereby you will pull yourself out of bed quickly,prepare,take the bus and arrive to the place with strangers. seemingly familiar strangers. yes, SCHOOL is what im talking about!

and i simply dread the eve of school reopening. sucks. you know it's the last day and you wanna treaure it. but then it all seems so short and it just keeps slipping away from your grasp.

but it's good. or not my brain juice is seeping out of my head at an exponential rate. i always feel like a ben dan during the holidays. ( ohya. i did my math homework today and guess what?!? i used a freakin' half an hour to solve an AP question. what the @#$&??? seriously. i wonder how im even gonna pass my a level.)
so i guess it's not that bad after all.
other than the long school hours, the fact that i have to wake up at 5.45am and homework.

anws. regarding training.. i just wish that we can do something different and not so brainless. or not i really feel like it's becoming a routine. and i don't wanna dread training. i have great dreams for this team but i start to wonder if we can really peak during this period. i hope we do.. but we gotta continue to work at it.

school's gonna be tiring but i hope God, you will continue to empower me.

I FEEL GOOD. ( weirdly good) excited but at the same time afraid of the future. it's gonna be chaotic and hectic.. but i think it's these challenges that make life more purposeful. it will be tiring but i hope i'll run the race!

so press on , the weary or the lazy bum bums!

some sort of motto that popped out :don't let ourselves down.
before blogging, i suddenly had the thought: " why are we training so many times and making so many sacrifices? what if we don't win at the end of the day?".
but i realised, if we don't try, we won't even have the chance to win.

so my dear team mates, if you're reading this. don't give up.

run the 3.3 km and do stages man!

love,
che.

2008-12-29T00:36:00.000-08:00

hi blog!

God is good, all the time!
haha. it didn't rain on saturday!

anws. wanna take this chance to thank all the seniors and weitian and of course YONGSHENG and Raph. thanks for making the event possible!

also, wanna thank Min Hui and Kian yong for helping me cut the paper in the morning!

hmm.and thanks to all those who encouraged me. : )

im super chui. but thank God. there is no training on wednesday!

after training on saturday, had this christmas outreach programme.
then without having the chance to bathe, i chiong-ed to meet the ahs gurls.
then saturday night, mum peeled for me a banana, so i had to finish it up. and because of that, i couldn't sleep until earliest 3am. and i woke up at 7am ( naturally)

then after that went to play ball. asked chin along but he discriminated my sport. ha. (chin if you're reading this, netball is also a ball ! )

then went to class chalet. actually i dreaded going cause i was freakin' tired. but it was good after all. having to see most of my classmates after such a long time.

then didn't do much.. just had dinner and played arcade. ( i played basketball, daytona,bishi bashi and drums!) so fun. screamed like mad.
then didn't stay over cause i had to wake up at 6.30am today for training.

CHUI.

but i got a deserving 3 days break.yay!

tmr is evaluation for the christmas outreach and cell gathering at yan bing jie's hse!
cooking pasta. haha. they are so honoured to eat my cooking! : )

ok. great.

oh.. forgot to tell you that i have a heel crack and it hurts like mad!
and also.. rach, i miss you too! ( i will find a time to stay over at your house !)

love,
che.

2008-12-26T06:52:00.000-08:00

wishlist

1) i hope tmr doesn't rain.
2) i hope i can run faster
3) i hope i can sprint faster
4) i hope i can be taller
5) i hope i can be smarter
6) i hope im not having big fat dreams.

seriously. arghs. i don't wanna do homework and i wanna do well for my team!

fine. i know solely hoping won't help.

love,
che.

2008-12-25T03:31:00.000-08:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYBODY!

Hi blog! Merry Christmas!

This year, Christmas is special. It really made me reflect on what truly is Christmas.

I have to admit,like many others, I always thought of Christmas as SOLELY a time of giving. But really, we are giving because God gave us the greatest gift in this world. This year's Christmas isn't exactly happening! but meaningful. I thought of how Jesus lived just to die. Most importantly,he died for people who were not in the least adorable. I feel so unjustified for Him. Like seriously. Taking the rap for people who were mean to you without getting any incentive. I don't think any of us in the right mind would do it. And it was such a high price to pay!

Hmm. : ) i love the messages and presents people gave to me too! Really heart warming! : )

after going for Christmas service and 85 for lunch, I came back home and slept till evening. Dog-tired.

Now, Mum's watching drama outside while I'm settling Christmas Outreach stuff. Haha. Gotta accompany her yea?

so bye blog!

mood: happy to the max.

love,

che.

2008-12-23T05:43:00.001-08:00

hi blog.

met up with yong sheng today.

asked people for their comments about last week's programme. Not seeking consolation but more of trying to make myself face reality.

Really. I've got to stop wallowing in self-pity. I've got to stop believing that's it's okay or IT'S BAD.
i've got to move on. and im happy to feel this way. I think really.. probably God is really teaching me some things from my failure. : )

difficult to face it but hmm.. who asked me to pray for sufferings. Hahas. silly me.

But i am still worried that people won't come for this week's event. I really hope I didn't drive them away!! LIKE SERIOUSLY. so whoever is reading my blog.. must come!

BUT THEN AGAIN.. I HOPE IT WILL RUN SMOOTHLY. Or not i'll probably go into a depression. hahs.

Xmas is coming! : )

Happy birthday Jesus! I hope I can give u a good gift!

love,
che.

2008-12-22T19:33:00.000-08:00

hello blog.

i was emo-ing on saturday and sunday. thought i really screwed up the party. : (

thought i couldn't pick myself up.

but I thank God for

1) shirleen for her encouragement
2) netball because i felt MUCH less upset after training
3) Ralph for bearing the mistakes and " failure" with me

hmm. NEXT WEEK WILL BE BETTER. at least i know my mistakes already. hahas.hope i didn't chase them away! PLEASE COME BACK!

anws. saturday night was cool. sat on the same table as Ian,Julian,Jeryl,Mae Yan and Lydia and of course my immediate family members. listened to them chat. it was fun. thinking of the past.

oh. and yesterday.. met up with councillors! I MISS THEM! AND I LOVE THEM MAN! we really established great friendships. : )

LATER MEETING YONGSHENG . WE MUST DO OUR BEST!!!

love,
che.

2008-12-13T18:54:00.000-08:00

HI EVERYBODY! : )

CHRISTMAS IS COMING! YAY!

and... this Saturday ( 20th Dec).. we are having our event pa(rty)lette!

DETAILS ( if you wanna come and give me a pleasant surprise)

Venue: All Saint's Church Main Sanctuary ( situated in AHS)
Time: 2pm- 5.30pm ( tentatively)
Dress code: COLOURS!

it's a birthday party for Jesus!

and also on the 27th Dec..

Same time, same place, different programme.
it's wet games!

MUST COME MUST COME! ( because I'm involved in the planning of the programmes.. hahas)

little bit scared. it's only in less than one week's time! AH!! hope the programmes will run smoothly!!

ok. pardon me for my exclamation marks.. adrenaline rush,mixed feelings.

reading a library book now. Ghostheart.

hahas. but it only goes to show that i haven't been touching my bible a lot and HOMEWORK ( even at all).

great.......

must get into mugger mode soon.

love,
che.

2008-12-08T18:27:00.000-08:00

haiyoh. the sequence is in a mess again!!

nvm. anws. ytd. 39th SMEXCO went to sentosa!

I MISS THEM!

not much changes in many.. just that daryl turned BURNT. Glenn straightened his hair. hahas.

anws. it was drizzling all the while. made me a little sluggish. but other than that, i enjoyed playing on the beach on a rainy day! : ) (refer to the pic where my hair is wet) LANG BEI BAH?!?

played volleyball and captain's ball. and we stopped ALL captain's ball when Han Lu's head was elbowed by Victor. and the bump instantly.. woah.. grew to the size of two cherries.

actually im the one to blame..shouldn't force the ball to Victor. :P

oh. we saw a peacock on the beach! : )

anws. after that went to siglap for dinner. at cartel. ate till my tummy popped out EVEN MORE.

nothing much. just a good time of reminiscing and catching up. I miss them. although i was never very RAH RAH in front of them, I've always felt comfortable with them. Just hovering around them and I'm happy.

After that took bus with fartdrum.. although i see him almost everyday in school before the school holidays, i still miss him lah. He's still very gentlemanly. Reminded me of the first time i went to an external school investiture. St marg's one. My partner was him and we realised that we both forgot to bring our tie when we were in tanah merah mrt station... and he ran all the way back to school to get our ties.xiang shuo.. that time i was quite lazy at the thought of running back lah. in my skirt and long sleeve. : ) so thank you fartdrum.

yeah. im gg teo heng later. wo shi teo heng! : )

i'm happier, maybe happiest at this moment.

ytd wong and i were talking about our spiritual walk with God.

and she asked me if there was any turning point that made me draw especially close to Him.

and i pondered for a while. "no leh. ", i told her.

i told her that it has always been gradual.

and really i realised. .God has always been by my side, quietly teaching me more about Him and also revealing to me my life each day. So i shouldn't wish for a big breakthrough, just a closer walk with Him..

love,

che

2008-12-08T18:05:00.000-08:00

haiyoh.pardon me.. my post and pictures are so disorganised.. i kept dragging and dragging the picture and it doesn't want to move. : (

anws anws.. if you didn't manage to guess the components of the evil mixture. it consists of...

TABASCO,RED PEPPER,PEPPER,SALt and WATER. yucks to the max. :P

oh oh forgot to tell you that the photos are placed in the wrong sequence also.

anws. after most of the camp comm members left, peng,jansy,lowelle,min hui and i stayed. and we played indian poker! and guess what?!? the evil concoction was the punishment. and surprise surprise! me the noobster drank it at least 5 times! ARGHS! and seriously the aftertaste sucks.

oh.forgot to tell you that we were in eighteen chefs.

( little bit too excited)

oh before that..we already started our evil game. actually i initiated it. haha. we played zhong ji mi ma and we squirt MANY sauces on the spoon to serve as punishment. * notice the pun of the word SERVE.

oh. and if you saw that cute guy. he's peng peng. look at the change in his expression and you would know how horrible it is. I GOT TABASCO. eew.

ok.at the last pic you see..nothing evil.. just pengpeng,keli and min hui. : )

ok. now time for sentosa pics.. don't know if it will be screwed up.

ok. fine as usual. you know me. look up for the lastest post. sounds stupid. of course you won't miss it.

2008-12-07T04:07:00.000-08:00

these few days i've thought about many events,about what i've said...

sometimes i don't understand why im putting on a facade. i'm tired. i just want to nua at home without having to think about other commitments. The setting of farewell date for the seniors, class outing, christmas outreach. these what seem like easy tasks.. but i just wanna put them all aside. responsibility vs willingness. really... i want to serve. i don't wanna do things forcefully. Lord!! please rejuvenate me!

thought through a lot. don't know why i make myself so unhappy. there are many beautiful things that happen in my life. just some hiccups.

why do i keep wallowing in self pity?

i still have my cute brothers and sisters and my besties...

1) leepeng. i miss u a lot!! when u called my name ever so loudly that time, i wanted to embrace you. sounds drama.. but your voice just kept resonating in my mind..

2) estee. kan dao ni zhen hao.
*i miss yu hua, daryl and jun le. i hope to have them back.

3) pengpeng.. you're a xiao da ren.

4)lowelle and chin hee. so willing to serve although u guys may be giddy having to run about.

5) janus. for looking blur but being actually so intellectual. i'm proud of ya.

6) min hui. for doing your job so beautifully. but have faith and u will see the beauty.

7) yongsheng. for loving.

8) abby and eunice. i hope this couple would shine for God.

9) ally.. other than your beautiful voice, your heart is beautiful too.

10) seniors especially cui fen jie for being so patient with me and ever so helpful.

11)chee soon. for teaching me how to love God.

12) margaret jie. seriously couldn't think of something to crticise you about.

13)cheryl. for showing me that you are worthy of my love.

14) nathan for being an expressive but honest brother.

15)jingyu for teaching me bass and yan bing jie for being the first and only to praise me. appreciated it.

16) Ke li for the cookies.

17) wei tian for your childish nature.

18)kenneth. for teaching me how to want to glorify God.

19)sin yee. for being so meticulous.

20)yi rong. you've got a beautiful character.

21) Si hui for encouraging me.

22) many others.. sorry if i've forgotten you.

23)God. for being there for me.

through this camp and the aftermath, i've learnt that i want to be a blessing to others. even in the most simplest way....

so Lord mould me. : )

love,
che.

2008-12-06T04:24:00.000-08:00

hello peeps!! I'm BACK FROM CAMP!
haiyah.at first very ju sang..because we are being compared to the other batches and im just very paranoid... BUT really why i zai hu all this? Really.. it's the joy of seeing GOD work in His people.. regardless of how good or bad the programmes and transition are.. : ))

ok..go to http://chinhan.smugmug.com/gallery/6708146_enKYK#428304568_ucPEV if you're interested.

hahas.lazy to post.

btw, that is only day one.. explore to see more...

i fell in love with my brothers and sisters.

but not my sister at home. i don't understand why must she always scream at me for the most ridiculous stuff. i'm tired. i guess she is troubled..but sometimes it's reaching my limit to stay happy. have to try to understand her pain when she is hurting me with her caustic words. tired ttm. * i know i sound stupid but just let me rant.

i don't want to keep posting such blogs. i wanna appear happy. i don't wanna look emo but some unhappy stuff just keep popping out.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHSSS.

love,
che

2008-11-24T18:44:00.000-08:00

boohoo. TEOHENG is cancelled! : (

nvm. it gives me time to do my stuff and Renai Camp stuff. so oh wells.

tse see don't need to feel bad. i know you have no choice lah.

arghs. dry run for day two programmes is coming!!! i hope things go well. * cross my fingers.

I'm like on a merry-go-round. Turning round and round,but not knowing what I'm achieving. After going round and round, doing things seemingly in an orderly manner ( but in actual fact it is all aimless), i realised that really.. only with the FEAR of the Lord, would i really "succeed". I guess I haven't really been serving. I've been doing things my way. Rushing here and there with my own strength. Didn't pray, didn't seek Him. In our business, we often forget Him..even if the things are done with an initial aim of glorifying Him. It's like chasing the wind. Chasing after nothingness. Fumbling and tumbling on my own..when trying to reach the finishing line....but getting nowhere near the final destination. Just like falling into a bottomless pit. It's horrible. So I must really learn why am I doing it! : )

hahas. hope my sharing will be useful even to the non-believers. Sometimes, we keep struggling to hang onto things and suffering due to the hectic schedule. Doing things without a passion, without an ultimate goal... then why are we doing them? For self-gratification? If you know you want it, go for it. but know the purpose....

just like netball. am I training for the sake of training? Or do I believe we can all work towards it? Do I even want it? It's really a workout... not a training.

but then again... what can I do?

love,
che.

2008-11-23T22:29:00.001-08:00

yeah. just woke up from my mini afternoon nap. shioks! at long last..finally i get my nap! : ))

che to merc: ok.poor dude.i'll try my best. because nxt week i have a camp.. so this week would be quite crazy too. but i'll do it soon! sorry!

ok. just strained my ankle. arghs. pathetic.
thankfully it's not that serious.. so i can train on weds i guess.

saturday was the last day at beacon primary school and i loved the experience... i guess.
i love the interaction with the kids and wow. i'm impressed by the student leaders. Though they are just primary 1s, they are so much more assertive compared to me.

hmm.nothing much. just preparing for Renai Camp now.

ok. cya guys soon.
tmr gg teo heng!!!!

love,
che.

2008-11-21T05:33:00.000-08:00

hello blog and friends.

finally im blogging. :)) YEAH!
i guess i cha bu duo finish my work for Day Two Prog for Renai Camp. Cool stuff.
haven't edit prog fo xmas outreach. oops! but finally can take a breather! yeah.
but dry run is on thursday and i hope things go well man!!! argh...
oh..and tmr is the first band prac. somehow i wished gab won't be with me cause im scared he feels sianed. and i don't wanna burden him. but then again there are new songs which i don't have scores for and i haven't prac. and even the songs i practised.. it's like SHII...AT. boohoo.

but i'm happy.

today trained with soccer girls and the coach was really encouraging. : )) thanks. we needed it.

oh.and went sentosa with loveus today! had fun! but why do i always hafta miss out on stuff. hahas. anws. love the peeps in loveus. I hope we will continue to grow!

talking to irving now. Zhen Hao. He is speaking more normally. : )) feel so much better. Irving, if u happen to read this.. you should speak like this more often. You don't always hafta be so formal yea! Feel more comfortable this way. : )

sorry class. i've been a bad gurl. didn't coordinate for the outing when i promised i would. going bonkers already. sorry. i'll do it soon. forgive me.

and to God. i'm sorry. i really am.

Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like you have loved me
Break my heart from what breaks yours
Everything I am for your kingdoms cause
As I go from nothing to
Eternity

( Hosanna by Hillsong)

oh. it's my last day of work tmr. phew!

love,
che.

2008-11-18T06:31:00.000-08:00

I'm dying. arghs. : ((

hahas. hope work would be more meaningful....

anws. hope u guys are enjoying yourselves tagging on my tagboard. hahas. childish GUYS. lou...i'll support you all the way. like duh. hahas.

have fun!

too nua to blog much.

love,
che.

2008-11-14T04:03:00.000-08:00

to sef: wah. im dumbfounded. when were you so nice? surprisingly you didn't criticise me.
to merc: yes.my voice is recovering now. we MUST GO!! Yeah! Yupps. K is such a fun thing. we arrange again??
to lou: hahas. yupps. i haven't heard their duet but i reckon it sucked.
to merc again: me and lou have each other. : ))

okie doks. Today i went clarke quay and chinatown.
just window shopped. and then walked to chinatown.

wah. we were supa pathetic. me and rach didn't have money then we had to scrimp on everything.

and chinatown is supa cool. got a lot of cool stuff. and i miss ah GONG when i saw that familiar place. i hope he will recover and be back to normal..

anws.then supa cool lah. i felt like a coolie or something. have to manage my money wisely.
ok. sounds stupid.but shir,rach and i ate yummy traditional food before we left.

today didn't go cell. yan bing jie don't seem so pleased. haiyoh. but i have to spend more time with mum.. i mean she wants my attention much more after i told her about my faith.

oh wells. it's difficult.

im talking to teng now. HAHAS. I DON'T MISS YOU A TEENY WEENY BIT.
he's talking to me about my job. Ok..so i shall tell you guys more about it.

Im working in beacon primary school and the primary one students is the pioneer batch.
i do odd jobs from decorating a "tree",doing ppt slides, transferring the hard copy of survey results to soft copy, compiling programme booklet,taking video and maybe disciplining the kids in the canteen.

WONDERWOMAN.

realised that a working person must really be capable in a lot of aspects.
anws. it's a promising school lah..but the staff have to do more to work it out man!
and they should not make us do funny jobs but make good use of us lah.
ok..i made it sound as if im a genius. hahas.

okie doks. i had fun.. just that my spiritual walk hasn't been good. so pray for me if you can and want. :)) oh.. and im playing for renai camp,the bass guit. so pray for me also. but i just wanna use music to praise Him. don't need to gain recognition. :)) oh..and pray for my sister also. Pray that she will do well in her exams. THANKS .

take care peeps.

love,
che.

2008-11-10T05:51:00.000-08:00

hello. sorry..haven't been updating cause im really quite busy.

whenever i come online, have to complete some important tasks.
sometimes i feel like nua-ing.

but nvm.. im happy.

but mum keeps thinking im not. especially when i reach home late. she thinks im escaping from home. hahas.

NO. SERIOUSLY.

but undeniably, dad has lost his trust in me. Like every single thing I do, especially when i reach home late, he thinks it got to do with church. and he will interrogate me.

Sigh.

anws. yesterday when Kent Ridge Park? Is it? I just walked blindly.
it was quite enjoyable. I enjoyed the fellowship. but had to miss netball.

then after that went to simpang to eat. was starving.
had a great talk with my dear AHS netballers. reminiscing. cool stuff.

oh. i didn't mention. for those who yet to see me, i cut my hair!!
but somehow i miss my hair. i mean i like my hair now.. but my head itches when i sweat A LOT. (which i usually do)

lazy to take and upload pictures. so too bad.

oh. im getting a new phone probably this sunday. do suggest what i should get!! : ))
oh. this means i have to miss netball again.

ohya. forgot about andy.
doubt a lot of you know about what he did. But whatever it is, I"LL REMAIN A FAN OF HIM!!
hahas

gonna miss my classmates a lot. except tengwei. hahas

oh. tmr im working. kinda exciting. working with shir,mao and suni. yeah.
bye.

sorry for the fragments.

love,
che.

2008-11-03T07:07:00.000-08:00

more pictures ( i mean picture) which are taken on my birthday celebration.

BEWARE! i can be unglam!

oh.and the promised photos taken on the wedding.

and we go spastic.

BEFORE. Me and Jie before the wedding.

AFTER. Me and Jie turned retarded.

okies. i'm gonna prepare for my op. wish me luck.

oh. and thanks all for your concern but im really fine. For those who are thinking why my family is so drama-ma-ma, it's usual. If you ever watched a typical taiwan drama,my family is like that. Very cute and fun-loving, but when D-day comes, VOOM.. things go mad to the max.

Hahas.but i love my family and we are living happily ever after ( but probably with some hiccups ) so.. DON"T WORRY!!

ok.love ya guys.bye.

2008-11-02T03:46:00.000-08:00

this is ME! this is how you hog onto the camera.

the standard emo face girls do when we camwhore.

and the funny ones.

don't look at me with those faces. don't talk to me with that tone.

IM FINE. REALLY... Better than before actually.

especially andy... you look at me as though im gonna die the next moment.

and rach. it's so silly of you to think im angry at you.

but ultimately.. i wanna say IM SORRY.

the previous blog must have scared you guys and give you guys the impression my world is collapsing.

No lah no lah. Im happy.

we are having loads of fun TOGETHER like before.

mum said i can go church but cannot get baptised. and i understand what's worrying her. so im fine with the idea. i just have to officially tell dad about this issue.

oh..and i posted some pictures so that it would look so gloomy...

was playing wii that day.supa unglam but FUN.

oh.and yesterday was pearline jie jie's wedding. ( my cousin if you're wondering)

we did a lot of fun stuff.

we did stupid faces with the bride and groom. hahas. all the cousins.

you should look at my family. it's huge.. and it's exPANDING. hahas. more weddings in the years to come.

more dresses,more heels. yikes.

oh..and they had this cute photographer. he takes candid pictures which look so pretty. really professional. and we can get our pictures printed!!! such a cute idea.

i got a few. come to my house and i'll show you.

wanted to upload the pics me and jie took. too lazy. next time.

we did unglam stuff.

ok.i've loads of things to do.

bye. have fun till i next blog again!

opps. realised my blog is in fragments. forgive me.

but it's short and sweet. yeah.

2008-10-29T19:25:00.000-07:00

LIFE IS A DRAMA.

Mummy and i went to eat breakfast on monday. throughout.. it was . i've no vocab to describe. but i felt hurt and bold at the same time. mummy keeps bringing up the FACT that she is gonna divorce dad.

and after our meal, i told her that i got something to tell her. and she insisted i tell her then.

I WANNA BE A CHRISTIAN.

and like usual, parents have a tys and she asked the frequently asked questions.

but things went normal?!? we continued shopping like nothing happened. and she told me she can't stop me even if she wants to.

then we went home and i went to take a nap. and then jie came in or should i say nightmare.

jie asked me about my faith and she said that mum was crying throughout.

i understand their worries. i understand them. my heart pains because i hurted them. but faith... it's something difficult to explain. IM NOT BRAINWASHED. i just believe.

so mum had cold war with me. i went to find cuifen and yan bing jie and cried uncontrollably.

and i decided i had to be firm.. or not i've to go through all this again.

so ytd. i went for training, met van,met the juniors and then ate dinner with them and min hui and went to abner's house.

then at 9.12pm. dad called and asked me why im not back at this time. and i was puzzled.. 9 is still so early. and i knew he knew.

so. i rushed home and went to bed straight away.

then jie came in again. and she cried aloud. it really pained me to she her being tortured because she is sandwiched. and i thank God for her. i really love her. because when mummy came in to hug her. and her only... she nudged her and came to hug me.

and mum kept shaking my hand and begging me to not do this. i almost relented. i just kept mum and kept crying.

then i moved to jie jie's room and it then continued. but mum touched me now. and i nodded when they said that i can keep my faith and go only when im older. no church for now.

i blamed God. i mean i thought you said that you won't let me bear more than i could. why was i tempted to relent. and presenting all this threat and pain.. which is my weakness.. isn't it equivalent to me having no choice. because i wouldn't say yes....

and today morning, mum left me a letter again and wrote in chinese something abt going church when im 21.

so i was already thankful though saddened.

and then later she called. she said i could go to church but only get baptised when im 21. and only then will she consider.

i just cried and cried. im so happy. but i hope mummy will also find comfort. and not continue to hurt....

2008-10-25T07:31:00.000-07:00

hello everybody. the blog post is back by POPULAR DEMAND! Yeah. i know. you can't resist reading my blog and you simply CRAVE for more.

i shall fulfill your wish.

hahs. IT"S MY BIRTHDAY! YEAH!
this is one of the most enjoyable birthday in my whole entire life.

ok. start with thanking peeps..

1. GOD.. because im alive and healthy
2. my family. my strawberry shortcake. wished that my family would receive salvation.
3.08S44 esp those who smsed me. erm. aline and kimberley too!! * love ya kims. OH MY BIRTHDAY CAKE WAS HEAVENLY. Walnut cheese cake. oh. thanks mercyn for keeping the cake in case you are still jealous.
4. Cedar Alumni Club who sang me a birthday song. oh. and grr. MS TEOH. who poured water on my head. hahas. oh and coral.. who gave us a discount of one round of sprinting because it's my birthday.
5. VJ NETBALLERS!! The cake was yummy! thanks shir for packing the cake so nicely.
6. Renai peeps esp MUST CELL and Yanbing jie. I love my pressie.
7. and of course my dearies. AHS netball. gonna see you guys tmr. yeah.

ok. now exciting exciting. my pressies!!!!

1. mum bought me a watch. but my heart ached after that.
2. jie bout me the examination kit with all the labels. really thoughtful. hope you're feeling better.
3. daddy sang me a birthday song. hahas.
4. lou got me a big notebook which i've always wanted.
5. 08S44 for getting me the letter set from paperchase. sorry you guys spent a lot when the class is fundless.
6.vj netballers got me a cake!
7.yanbing jie gave me a book! yeah! i'll donate it to the mobile library. but rest assured i'll keep the msg.
8.must cell for the famous amos cookie and the paperchase stickerS.

that's all so far. but im really happy regardless of the size or price of the present. i love the thoughtfulness of you guys.

thanks to my family for making it a point to buy me a cake and sing me a song though you guys are really busy. and mummy and daddy for being such WONDERFUL parents.

oh. talking to merc, tengwei and lou now. so crap lah.
love my classmates. EXCEPT TENGWEI.

we watched coffin ytd. no comments. cause in the first place i don't really fancy movies.

and thanks lou. i like your msg and encouragements. and i thank God for you because there is someone whom i can have a heart to heart talk with.

thanks cedar alumni club. had fun training with you guys today and had a lot of laughter.

oh my vj netballers esp ning, jas and of course SHIR. for getting me the cake.

renai peeps. it's really heart warming. and i really enjoyed the fellowship we had on the table. thanks si hui for joining us for dinner. . and the cute and immature BOYS. ( chin hee, abner, su huai and jason) oh. and the birthday songs!

I really am blessed. so much gratitude. THANK YOU GOD for placing these people in my life.

oh.. and and and next year onwards please get me cakes with CANDLES please. cause i wanna make an impt wish. that my family would receive salvation and that i'll tell them soon. and maybe baptism?

HAIYOH.

anws. tmr playing NETBALL. LOVES. oh... and monday NO TRAINING. Ms teoh is SO NICE! but it means weds,fri and sat training wld be more intensive???

argh. i am in such a good mood. i bet i can't sleep tonight.

oh. and rach... thanks for your bdae song. love ya. and DON'T BE NAUGHTY AND GO AGAINST JING HAN AH!!!! Forgiveness dudette!! : ))

oh. and thanks rach and hui xin for trying to stay up until 12am but failed. still love you gurls.

ok. anws. i wanna shepherd eunice and guide her. i know she will shine. JIA YOU EUNICE!! nice try today but rmb nxt time don't be so last min ok?.. but it's my fault also lah.. didn't monitor and pick up your call. arghs.

ok. see ya.

tmr. glenn, sinyee, rongrong, shir are special guests. YEAH!.

2008-10-15T18:30:00.001-07:00

tse see, tse see.. please don't be sad. it really pains my heart to see you like that.
you saying you're gonna retain is as if im gonna retain. im sharing your sorrows.

parents usually equate results to hard work. so they think you have not tried. but i worked with you and i know you tried hard. but sometimes things just don't go our way.

i don't know what to say to make you feel better. and i don't know what advice would help you make a good choice. but in the first place... can't the situation be salvaged? how i wish i got first hand information..

anws. before i know anything.. tse see, please try to cheer up because your smile is really important to me!

love ya gurl. take care. and here is a virtual hug from me.

2008-10-13T08:31:00.000-07:00

hello. just had a game with ite.

we merged with ajc netball for today. had fun with them. today's performance sucks. i guess i got to be more disciplined and use my brains when i play. : )

to rach and tsesee, thanks for your encouragement. you guys really made my spiritual walk with God much more easy.

oh . wanna share with u guys something i learnt during the sermon and sunday school.

you know sometimes we ask God or maybe ourselves why do we have to suffer? Sometimes im angry with God because he sent natural disasters and all the political instability. you start to ask where is the love?

but then think of lepers. they don't feel the pain! and this very fact makes their life so painful. their organs may drop off but they just don't feel the pain at all.

so surprise surprise! PAIN IS A GIFT. A BEAUTIFUL GIFT!

i shan't elaborate more. im certain this example would be more than enough to let you be thankful for your sufferings.

Indeed. i really love my team now. and we're gonna fight together. i have the urge now to not work FOR them ( live up to their expectations) but to work for them because i want to go through this with them. So i have to push myself and be disciplined.

ok back to the point. i thank God for all the pressure and all the unneccessary politics we are facing. because such sufferings made us grow.

and to all who are weary, who are frustrated with whatever nonsense. praise the Lord!

and to Rach. wanna be frank with you. You gotta cut down on your vulgarities. Know it's frustrating and you feel like pulling off her hair. but you gotta contain your anger and use other means to simmer down. i mean it's foolish to curse and swear for such a reason.

okie doks. wanna do so much things during the hols. hope i will have a meaningful hols. and arghs. sorry for whining. but i gotta go all the way to pp to take a passport size photo for my ogl application form and then go back to school to hand it in before 12pm. and i have to wear uniform and shoes. why must they insist on having my photo!?! ok lah. im just being plain lazy.

ok end my blog with a short story.

it is about this composer who wrote 8000 gospel songs.
she was born in a really poor family.
When she was 6 weeks old, she was running such a high fever,liquid was oozing out from her eyes.
as her parents were to poor to afford a decent doctor, they got an unlicensed one who laid something hot on her eyes ( without proper knowledge)

and she went blind.

her mum was obviously overwhelmed with contrition and her last words ( i think) were " im sorry. if only we were richer". ( her dad died when she was one)

and she said " it's okay mum. If i could choose again, i would still choose to be blind because the first person i'll see would be the Lord."

so beautiful. so beautiful.
it's not even like it's not your choice or i have forgiven you . but the first person I'll see would be the Lord.
everytime i think abt it, i wanna tear.

it's ok mum. because the first person i'll see would be the Lord.

2008-10-12T01:26:00.000-07:00

hello. nothing especially happening these few days other than training.. : ))
oh. scoopz ice cream sucks. i wasted money on it. and my heart aches.

che to han: I WANT!! Sony Ericsson one? anws. you didn't call tsesee. hahas. she was with me. act she helped me msg you. so you are in hot soup!!
che to rach: look who's talking? you pon star. but i told my ct the truth when he asked me what happened to me. i told him i pon. hahas. thankfully he didn't scold me.
che to lou: don't worry. i know. terence saw me blogging. but they don't know my url. anws, im okay with them reading my blog. im just not gonna publicise my blog. it's just for close friends to read. :)) thanks dear.
che to shir: hahas. haiyoh. sounds so silly. of course they know it's not me. hahas. : P

went to eighteen chef with lp and weitian. we did some sharing. until now i still haven't figure how to tell my parents im a Christian. I mean i don't mind facing the consequences but how do I break the news? and when?

2008-10-09T18:09:00.001-07:00

hello. im trying to do my Renai stuff here. but my school's computer freakin' lousy, can't open the hotmail site. so im blogging.

che to tsesee: you sure? cannot retaliate !!
che to rach:hahas. no lah. I'm just supa glad you're fine. Im proud of ya because you picked yourself up so fast. my phone battery has been flat for the past few days because my sister doesn't want to lend me her charger. and i lost mine during student camp. So im like uncontactable. waiting for dad to buy me a phone. hopefully he's reading this. but the probability that he will read this is 0.
che to rach AGAIN: i'm a mixed breed maybe. maybe i became piglet.
che to shir: yupps.not very funny but you should be used to it.
che to rach ONCE AGAIN: living in self denial
che to shir: yeah. told you the fengshui of my url is supa good.

ok.gonna pon lessons to eat breakie with my dear vj netballers. bye.

2008-10-08T06:22:00.000-07:00

i just ate steamboat.... AGAIN. Im such a pig.

anws. han. what can i say? hahas. you deny you're loud?nah.
rach. im worried about you but i know you will pick yourself up again. cry all you want but after that come back stronger. I believe the outcome won't be that bad. even so, you know that there are many people out there encouraging you. Wells. I'm glad you're better. and regarding ytd, it was my fault. Didn't show you concern and needed you to console me. hahas. but i'm fine. really.my dad was being cute. : ))

2008-10-07T23:00:00.000-07:00

Rachel. I love you. I know it's really mushy but I wish you know this.
I don't know what exactly your life and thoughts are like right now.. but press on and know that I'm with you!

2008-10-06T05:56:00.000-07:00

hello dudettes and maybe dudes?

hahas. told ya the url is GREAT. everybody remembers it! even hui xin!?! How did you get to know about my blog? : )) awesome.

che to shir: ok. glad you're having fun. ha.

che to rach: thanks dear. but we just parted a few hours ago? hahas. must meet up often yea? though we're busy with training.

che to hui xin: it's like what? 5 months ONLY.

che to tse see:it's obvious tse see. hahas. hmm. yea. i'm sure it's a tap! you bet i'll tap you like nobody's business the next time i see you. haas.

okies. shall tell you guys about my day.

got back all 5 of my subjects. it was mentally and emotionally draining .

some cried, some rejoiced. some cried with them,some rejoiced with them.

but nevertheless, we should all move on. anyway.what's done cannot be undone.

we've tried maybe. but things may not turn out the way we want. so?

i learnt how to leave it to God and not be greedy. He provides and it's sufficient. Maybe not satisfactory but at least i cleared the promos. so i wanna give thanks.

i also wanna give thanks to those who improved esp the sports players who got suspended from training. it's really great to see your hard work being paid off.

and to those who did badly. pick yourself up. i'm sure the everyone would be behind you.

oh.just read my profile. sheesh.indeed i got stung by a stupid insect! idiotic insect! cost me a BOMB. nvm.must practise what i preach. let bygones be bygones.

ok. to all the vj netballers. maybe you're not reading this but i still wanna say. I LOVE YOU GUYS!

maybe it was difficult for us to build the rapport and team dynamics initially but i think all the sufferings we are going through will make us grow TOGETHER.

i love the ball and i hate running. man! Lord please grant me strength!! : ))

anws. going to Teo heng with must cell on friday! wonderful! i love it. hahas. Glenn would you be coming? hahas.

okies. gonna do my part for the renai activity planning . have fun peeps. and brace yourself up if you have gotten bad results! cause people whom love you are worried for you.

2008-10-05T05:27:00.000-07:00

hello. yeah. had steamboat. shir's peeping at my blog now. : )) ok.she claimed that it is outright.

now.. hmm. i changed my blogskin. Rach helped me with it. the profile and title are stupid.obviously isn't my work. nvm. i shall leave it there, so that i would be reminded of this day and the fun times i had with them.

today had steamboat at shir's hse. Salmon is nice. yums. thanks shir.

I love the netballers and the time we had over the table. it's great. we were reminiscing. wah lau. i remembered we danced for 8 secs on stage during sec 1 and the dance we put up during sec 2s. embarrassing moments. wanna dig a hole in the ground and hide. hope nobody would remember.

okies. tse see and shir are bickering over a stupid chair. hahas. im sure she will smack me if she sees this. she did. (no...they did)

okies. i told Cui Fen Jie i would join BC 1 today. Glad i made the decision. Hope i would not focus on my inadequacies and psycho myself that i can't evangelise. I wanna do it for Him.

anws. Gabriel's gonna teach me bass. Hope his blood vessels won't burst. and to Jing Yu. I'm sorry. sometimes I feel frustrated with myself and how i wish i am a GENIUS. save me someone!

okies. they are asking me to watch something. gotta go. bye!

2008-09-27T07:08:00.001-07:00

hahas.yesterday was Tse See's birthday! Happy birthday gurl!

well. Grace was frank and shared with us that she felt nervous about having to meet us after such a long time. But we or at least i was glad she felt good after all.

same sentiments. not exact as i knew we will not stray away ( in some sense) and we talked like we were back in secondary school. I missed those times when we would just chill and laugh out loud. Nothing really unusual but really heartwarming.

and at last i saw Hui Xin. like for many rotting donkey years i haven't seen her. She's looks good and happy so I'm really glad.

Yeehan is still as loud and ear jarring. hahas. nah. glad she is still as happy-go-lucky as ever.

Oh. and belinda. she said THAI PAN has shifted. sad. i didn't even go for class lunch they had over there the last time. boo hoo.

Kamhei couldn't join us for dinner but she popped by. She's really a changed person and that makes me love her even more. Remember the times I would go to her hostel room and sometimes we will chat till 11pm then i'll walk home.

Shirleen. hahas. i see her everyday and gets abused by her everyday, so i shall skip her. hahas. you'll probably smack me till i bruise all over.

and Tse see. ok lah. i don't think it's funny. the part about the scar. I mean it must really be horrible at least for once. but I'm really thankful that we can grow out of it and up together.this issue is fraught with sensitivities but oh wells.

oh and Rach. don't think i forgot about you. Jia you for your papers yea? we can celebrate together after that! and remember don't curse and swaer so much. Bad for ya. : ))

okies. now i shall talk about the day.

in the morning went for sunday school. hahas. i openly declare I like Zhen Kai Ge now. hahas. Last time used to think he is very scary but now i find him really nice and knowledgeable. and it seriously doesn't feel like 2 hours.it's really beneficial.

okies.then after that met up with chia and went to 85 for lunch. when we were climbing down chang cheng, we were just talking about qing nian ge and shu yi jie. and coincidentally we saw them in 85!! got me so excited. yeahs. and we are going out during the hols. cool stuff. shall ask every single forklifters,antm and lvers along!!

then went to play ball. oh before that, played or rather,had to entertain this little girl. she's really cute and she's a malay! but then we were really afraid about her well- being after we left her but then she just doesn't want to go back to her parents. sheesh. kids can be difficult.

oh.then played ball. supa off form. but doesn't matter. gotta train up before training officially starts.

okies we went to cartel and ate like pigs. the serving was supa big. luckily i shared with shir.
it was yummy lah. oh maybe just because i had great companions.

oh wells. today gonna play badminton and buy stuff for openhouse. awesome.

tmr supposedly have to go sentosa.... but i'm gonna drop the bomb. I have to go out with my mum.

another d-day. thursday. supposed to play badminton with must cell.but i realised i got sportsmen night and have to do openhouse stuff in the afternoon.

oh no. i have burst so many people's bubbles. hate it.
i'm really sorry guys. : (

okies. got to go. running late.